"No one ever tries to flee capitalism."

Well, that was a lie.

Fuck. Those fuckers at the store sold me No Purpose Flour again. What the fuck do I do with this

you laugh. my flour is bereft of purpose and you mock me. hell upon you, fool

Reading native plant gardening books in the library and when I look up my favorite plants they're all like "This plant easily becomes a WEED that is IMPOSSIBLE TO ERADICATE. If you aren't careful, this AGGRESSIVE plant will TAKE OVER YOUR ENTIRE GARDEN, KILL everything else you have planted, RUIN your marriage, and BEAT YOUR ASS"

From what I can tell, every gardener that writes a book has some petty, completely bullshit grudge against at least one innocent category of essential keystone plants for pollinators and wildlife, and it's usually because the plant grows and spreads vigorously instead of just sitting there where you put it and meekly existing.

Imagine being a gardener and complaining that your plants are too good at growing. Can't relate

My friend, not everybody has the money or the time to buy 72 tons of peat moss, manure, topsoil and mulch and fertilizer and has wagonloads of finished compost ready to go.

If your flower bed was a lawn for years or decades, and before that was razed and bulldozed when your house was constructed, and you can't afford truckloads of soil amendment to reverse the damage enough that something can survive in there, you don't WANT the well-behaved plants. You want the baddest motherfuckers Nature has to offer.

Not only is Canada Goldenrod one bad motherfucker, it's also basically cocaine for bees. And guess what, I don't have to deal with invasive species if my squad of leafy green thugs kicks their asses first.

ALT

can't get over the phrasing of this actually

WWE is drag for guys who wanna be cooler guys

Camp Masculinity

I don’t have children so take this with a grain of salt but I hate when you can tell people like the concept of their children more than their well-being. Parents like the concept of an all-beige nursery that’s photogenic more than they care about the development of their kid’s brain. They like the concept of a cutely dressed kid in designer clothes more than they care about their comfort and personal desires. They like the concept of a child who never eats poorly more than they care about the happiness that can come from a child eating some candy now and then. People need to stop treating their kids like little dolls

Uh, I have kids, and so I've spent a lot of time around kids and around other parents, and you are very much on to something.

Whether they have kids because they felt like they needed to or because they wanted an heir or whatever, they don't actually want to hang out with developing humans. They want the idea of kids. They want the Christmas card and the pictures on the desk and the Instagram picture.

They don't want the baby screaming for 5 hours straight because it's too cold out to walk to the store and get more baby ibuprofen for the ear infection on Friday night and your partner has the car. They don't get that the baby is crying because she's literally never hurt worse than this in her tiny life, and they don't get that their toddler has never been sadder than when her favorite toy broke, and that she really didn't know she would break it if she did the thing she just did. That the 4-year-old is crying because the world is too big and too overwhelming and she has no control over where she goes or what she does most of the time, and that the 14-year-old isn't telling them anything about her life because they told her ten years ago to shut up or they'd give her something worth crying about, so she knows they don't value her real feelings, only the ones she's supposed to have.

And they don't want to get any of it. And it fucking sucks that people who don't actually WANT kids feel like they have to have them, or have them to have something smaller than themselves to bully, or have kids as a status symbol. It all just blows, and mostly because:

Kids are people, and most people are actually pretty fucking rad, if given the opportunity to be.

There are a lot of good parents out there, and then there are the parents who had kids because they thought they had to, or wanted someone to boss around, or whatever. And like... even if you thought you wanted kids, you can quickly find out that it actually blows to be a parent in a nuclear family setup, and get really burned out on being a parent. Kids are much better raised by an extended family. That's how we're wired. And like... we broke it. We broke it, and it breaks parents and it hurts kids.

the group chat when i ask whos available to hang out next week

Honestly this is one of the best formatted jokes of all time.

dh2 girlies for brushtest <3